early on, at a young age, i realized that my life was worthless. there was no point. i wasn’t brought into this world for any special reason; i was just here. there would be no revelations about the reason for existence or my purpose on this earth. in spite of that stingingly cold and absolute realization, for many years i fought it, and tried to glean some meaning from my everyday existence. no meaning was hidden among the myriad days that crept by my ever waning inquiry. i am here and i am meant for nothing.
